To the moon and back

"I'm going to be the best mommy in the world someday..."  My six-year-old self declared to Caroline during a tea party.

No response.

"Caroline...did you hear me? I'll never make my kids clean their room, or eat vegetables! They will love me to the moon and back"

Again, silence.

"Noooo vegetables, did you hear that?!"

Nothing.

This wasn't entirely surprising... Caroline was my imaginary friend. 

Caroline kept me company, listened to my secrets, played against me in Sorry, Checkers, and Monopoly.  We discussed books over our Saturday afternoon tea parties, and played school, doctor, and dolls. 

At six, motherhood seemed so simple.

Twenty two years later, a 6lb. 10oz. pink, wrinkly, baby boy with a birth mark over his eye that looked like he got into a fist-fight was placed into my arms. I was in love. Exhausted, but in love.

At the exact moment this picture was taken, I vividly remember picturing Colin in a tuxedo, walking down the aisle on his wedding day. Maybe it was the pain medication, maybe it was the overwhelming joy, love and hope I felt for this new life (I'm going to go with the latter).  See, at that moment, I learned the meaning of unconditional love, I smiled with my entire heart, and I felt the utmost responsibility to raise an honest, polite, strong, and kind boy.

As he looked into my eyes for the first time it became real. I was a mother.

Nothing prepares you for motherhood.  The highs, the lows, and everything in between.  Obviously parenting isn't always roses and sunshine.  If only motherhood was as easy as chore and vegetable avoidance, right?! It's hard work, and sometimes smells like pureed peas (or worse!). But the rewards are worth every sacrifice, early morning, temper tantrum, and tear. 

In the past two years, I've had the privilege of watching my two boys grow, learn, and discover. I've had moments where I've been so overwhelmed with pride, excitement, and happiness that's I've cried true tears of joy. I've laughed harder than I've ever laughed before. When it comes down to it, we're a family, we support each other, and we love each other....to the moon and back.

And if Caroline and I sat down today, we'd certainly trade in the teacups for a glass of pinot, and she would let me know that even though I make my boys eat vegitables, I'm doing alright!

Happy Mother's Day!